Tomorrow I have Jury Duty...

Sucks I know...

But it made me think about one of the greatest films of our era. One of the biggest theatrical masterpieces of the 20th century. A film where dreams come true.

No, not Schindler's List, you sick bastard.

I'm talking about "Jury Duty" with Pauly Shore!

We all have grand dreams as children. Some of us wanted to be doctors, firefighters, or even werewolves (hey I'm not judging your dumb dream to be "doctors"). But my biggest dream growing up was to own a gorilla, though not as a pet, but as a best friend. This wouldn't be any old gorilla either. My new best gorilla friend would know sign language, and he could assist me in solving crimes in our detective agency, which we'll start together. Lucky for me I think I can finally make that dream a reality.

Due to a leaky wall (yes wall) in my house I no longer have a working Xbox, because water and electronics don't play nice with each other. It's my own fault really. I couldn't resist putting my Xbox next to a wall, I mean it was just so tempting. I wanted to live on the edge. But that's the price we pay for living a reckless life, you wind up dead or in jail...or in my case stuck with a wet video game console. Since I was always taught to make the best of a bad situation, I've come up with some inventive ways I can use my broken Xbox. 

In order for you to appreciate this, I must paint a picture with words. I apologize in advance for not being Shakespeare incarnate, but I'll do my damndest. The scene opens at 3am, not with your typical infomercial intro... some poor shmuck trying to do lawn work and over exaggerating his pain or incompetence, or some old lady who can't get up off the floor. The first scene of this infomercial does indeed show over exaggeration... of a cavalcade of women fumbling with their boobs, trying to make them look presentable, and utterly failing

I know what you're thinking... I was confused, at first, too. I thought I left on a saucy late night program. Sadly, this was not a Red Shoe Diaries marathon. This was a 30 minute spot for the Genie Bra, a bra that conforms to the female form like Venom's symbiote to Spiderman, enhancing a female's boobage. This was the Most Interesting Infomercial Ever.

Look at my well supported breasts!

So, we've been trying to spread the joy of DYHP all around the land, and in our quest to intergrate into the world of the interwebs we found an awesome site call Filmsy.com. This movie-centric site has tons of great articles about show-biz and the movie life. They feature various Top 10's and reader's thoughts on all the great movies out there.

To add our name into the hat, we created a list of Sequels We Want to See. The first of which is The Happening 2: Arbor Day, and the newest posted today was Forrest Gump 2: Forrest Does Fatherhood. So click on over and give it a read and check out the great articles on Filmsy.com

With the crazy hub bub surrounding TRON 2.0 Legacy, being a computer programmer and sci-fi geek, I have to confess I had never seen the original until a few days ago. It was released two years before I was born and even with the cult following it has, it was one of those things I always resolved to check out eventually, but just not today. Much like Red Dwarf and Star Trek, my skills in Nerd required some points leveled up in vintage and old school. It was after hearing the movie described as a world where humans are shown as the "programs" and controlled by the user, who they see as thier God, with Jeff Bridges being one user, that I squeed "OMG that sounds awesome!" and finally watched TRON. ( Side note: I'm also already through season one of Star Trek: The Next Generation =-D +2 to Vintage Nerd )

Even someone as cool as The Dude has his nerdy computer years

I know everyone is missing me like a fat kid misses Little Debbie, but I haven't been slacking off by any means.

I have a new blog up on The Daily Buggle that recounts the best and worst Hollywood remakes of all time. Won't you be a friend and check it out?

Peace and Love, Peace and Love.

I'd like to move to Kentucky and start "Kentucky Fest" or "KY Fest" for short.

Am I the only one who stops masturbating right after thinking about the movie 'The Truman Show'?

Doesn't it seem like every new episode of 'Kate Plus 8' is set up so Kate loses one of those kids while on vacation. "On the next episode, Kate takes the kids through a maze... in downtown New York... blindfolded!"

Mr. Miyagi knew about the possibility of a Gremlin take over (Gremlins are made in China like everything else). That's why he trained Ralph Macchio in the ways of karate. This way Ralph could beat some Gremlin ass when the time came (kinda like 'Buffy' but with Gremlins). Sadly Ralph wasn't ready and Phoebe Cates had to save the world from impending doom. Thanks Phoebe.

Every week I'm going to talk about something I hate, something that's overrated, or something that just flat out sucks. This week we discuss the "new" trend in cinema known as 3D. If you see the words 3D right in the movie's title, beware. It's usually a pretty good indication  that the director didn't feel like writing a script, casting any  decent actors and he spent most of the budget on his coke habit and the rest on the 3D.

 

But coke habits aside there are many more reasons 3D sucks..

Happy Friday once again DHYP community! I'm your resident movie buff and I will tell you what IS and IS NOT worth watching this weekend at the movies! Our rating system is simple, I will rate the enthusiasm I have for a particular movie 1 through 9. If the movie is gonna be killer it’ll be worth $9 Popcorn. If the movie is gonna be Battlefield Earth, then it’ll probably only be worth $1 Popcorn. 

This week we take a look at the Will Ferrell-Mark Wahlberg cop buddy comedy "The Other Guys" and Step Up for a third time, but in 3D! Are any of the movies opening this week worth your hard earned cash? You're about to find out!