Camping season is about to reach it's peak and that can only mean two things. There will be an increase in smore related forest fires and bear on human attacks will naturally be on the rise. Luckily for you I've come up with some helpful ways to deal with a bear attack, even if your only defense is to lie on the ground lifeless, while a hungry bear tears you limb from limb. 

 Okay so it probably isn't but today makes me wonder...

Hi! I'm Toby! a small child adult guy that spends way too much time on the interbuttz as it is so called these days.

Something in particular caused my mind to spiral into a train of thought. Preposterous, indeed.

A friend and I were traveling up I-476 so I could attain a (now worthless) headset for my computer so I could talk to those pitiful people from all over the world.  HOWEVER for some reason on this miserably humid day, some driver lost their mind and decided to quite literally HALT their vehicle in the middle of the causeway causing the remainder of traffic behind him (or her...) to follow suite.  Anger, frustration, bloodshed, and declaration of treaties ensued.  If the weather were any different on this awful day I might have been inclined to brush off this impediment. Nay, this Sparticus of the Asphalt had pushed me into a full-fledged blood thirst.

As our caravan of furious drivers passed this anarchist of the road, I caught a glimpse of the culprit.  

His car was overheating and considerable smoke was pluming skyward. 

._. 

suddenly I feel awful about myself.  

Good luck, disable driver.  May God have mercy on your vehicle (and mechanic!)

Over and Out, Spacecowboys.. 

Some thing's are better left unsaid, except for things like "Hey look out for that bus" or "Ok, but I used to be a man".

The recent oil spill in the Gulf Coast wasn't as bad as everyone thinks. It put alot of dolphins in their place, they were planning an uprising against humans, and now with the oil spill their resources are limited. I think we really dodged a bullet on that one. Have you ever seen what they can do to a shark?

Everyone's so concerned with whether or not Lady Gaga has a penis. Look at her, of course she does... Come on people. What I'm wondering is... Is that her real hair? It changes everyday. At least her buldge stays the same.

Running is the only Olympic sport that can also be a means for fleeing a crazed serial killer.

If you're ever stranded on a island, whatever you do, under no circumstances should you ever listen to the following: Gilligan, nude Brooke Shields, a soccer ball, or the Smoke Monster. Follow that rule and you may live... well that one and the rule: People don't taste like chicken. So, don't think eating your crew is gonna be easy.

HAPPY "DAY OF T HE TACO" EVERYONE!