There comes a time in every adult's life that they must put down the foam sword, or plastic lightsaber, they've been attacking their other "adult" friends with, and really become a grown-up. One such rite of passage is the creation and dedication to a budget. With that, also comes sacrifice. No, not humans you insane ass readers, luxury sacrifice! The following is a list of 3 things I'll miss now that I'm trying to become more of a grown up with my money.
3. DVR and OnDemand
Normally, we don't actually watch cable. At least not live, most days we simply record our favorite shows with DVR and watch at our convenience, or wait until it's OnDemand by the station that aired it. Our solution is Netflix and Hulu to see us through the wide world of entertainment. But, thems the breaks when you're an adult on a budget. I just hope they have decent rewind and replay capabilities, because I don't know how else I'll keep replaying the sketch scene from Titanic.
Isn't Leo dreamy?
2. Hookers and Blow
I know what you're saying. Wait, that's two things! True, but they go hand in hand, like Bert and Ernie, so cut me a break!. I couldn't even afford you before, but now my dreams of becoming as awesome as Tony Soprano and Robert Downey Jr have been dashed by adulthood! I'll never get to be Iron Man or Sherlock Holmes. I will never feel the soft caress of "Tina", the wonderful girl from Brooklyn, with a heart of gold and an Adam's apple to match. My social life had so much promise. Now, it's banished to the world of Netflix and pixie sticks. Do you know how many pixie stix it takes to equal cocaine? I'll tell you, ALOT.
I'd be the Tony Montana of pixie stix
1. Oero Cookies
Damn you Oero. You go with milk like Forrest Gump with Jenny whatever the hell her last name was... whoresalot?... yet you price yourself to make me think eating diamonds and lobster would be the more prudent purchase. 5 dollars a box is simply too much! It saddens me, but we must part ways.
I told myself I wouldn't cry :tear:...
Remember, I'll always love you.
AND IIIIIIIIIIIIII, WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
