RIP GARY COLEMAN... STAY COOL...
Let’s be honest, if you’re a man and you’re found dead wearing women’s underwear because you were choking yourself and tying things to your penis for erotic pleasure, then you’re probably gonna have to deal with some post-mortem comedy. Here are some jokes about dead celebs that I’ve seen recently.
We remember Sonny Bono with this gem:
Man: “You smoke?”
Man #2: “No, do you?”
Man: “Boy, I hit da trees harder than Sonny Bono!”
Here’s one about Mother Teresa and Princess Diana
St. Peter meets Mother Teresa at the Gates Of Heaven and says, "You were agood woman. I'm giving you a nice halo." Mother Teresa is walking aroundHeaven when she sees Princess Di, and the Princess has a much bigger halo.Mother Teresa goes back to St. Peter and says, "St. Peter, I spent most of myadult life helping the poor and the sickly. Princess Di did nowhere near theamount of charitable work I did. Why does she have a bigger halo?"
St. Peter says, "That's not a halo. That's a steering wheel."
Speaking of Diana…
What does DIANA stand for? Died In A Nasty Accident ... What do Pink Floyd and Diana have in common?They both had a hit with a wall.
AND OF COURSE… THE KING OF ALL CELEBRITY DEAD JOKES…MICHAEL JACKSON
- Michael Jackson hasn’t been this stiff since Macully Culkin spent the night at Neverland Ranch.
- Because Jackson’s body was 95% plastic, he will be melted down and turned into legos, this way kids can play with him for a change.
- Reports that Michael Jackson has died of a heart attack in his home are untrue… He actually died having a stroke in the children’s ward.
- In the spirit of recycling, Michael Jackson will be melted down into plastic party cups so kids can still get their lips around his rim.
- In accordance with Michael Jackson’s will, little boys’ pants shall be flown at half-mast today.
- Doctors are looking into claims that MJ’s death could have been caused by an allergic reaction from eating 12 year old nuts.
- I heard Michael Jackson died of food poisoning from eating a 5 year old wiener.
- Micheal jackson will always be with us… he is not biodegradable.
- Farrah Fawcett arrived at the Pearly Gates and God asked her what he could do for her having led such an honest life. Farrah asked God to simply make sure the children of the world were safe. Five minutes later, Michael Jackson died.
- MJ’s dying wish was to be melted down and turned into straws so he can still get sucked on by kids.
- It has been released that MJs last wish was that he wants to be melted down and made into a slide so kids can go down on him forever.
- In memory of MJ’s death, McDonald’s is coming out with the new “McJackson”. It’s 50 year old meat between 12 year old buns.
- Michael Jackson’s ashes are going to be put in an Etch A Sketch so kids can still twiddle his knob.
- Michael Jackson’s death has now been ruled a suicide. Apparently doctors told him that the only way he could get whiter is if he died.
- Only in America can someone be born a poor black kid, and die a rich white woman.
- Madonna sent her condolences to the Jackson family. Then asked how much they wanted for the kids.
- Breaking News: Casper the friendly ghost was molested in the early hours of this morning!
- Michael Jackson’s last words: “Take me to the Children’s Hospital!”
- What was Michael Jacksons last hit? The floor!
- Michael Jackson died of a heart attack. He really shouldn’t have looked at the man in the mirror.
Got any dead celebrity jokes? Throw ‘em in the comments section.
